Saturday, November 30, 2013

Vampire kryptonite.

Nature is abundant with perfect foods that sprout forth from the soil, but for me one reigns supreme: garlic.  Oh delicious garlic, how your pungent spiciness seduces me so.  Garlic is so perfect it even comes in individually wrapped portions.  If there's a recipe that includes garlic, you can be sure that I'll likely double the amount called for, with no regrets(I'll never care about garlic breath).  I roasted a head of garlic the other day for a recipe I was trying out.  It was my first time roasting garlic, but boy howdy, it's not gonna be my last time roasting it.  My apartment smelled like heaven and the roasted garlic in the acorn squash mash I made totally took it to the next level.  There is a restaurant here in Denver that serves bread before the meal with roasted garlic to spread on the bread.  Om nom nom.  In Los Angeles, one of the vendors at the farmer's market sold fermented garlic.  I miss fermented garlic, so tangy and delicious.  Seriously though, garlic is the best.  I feel like I'd eat it on anything, but that's far from the truth.  Garlic on literally anything would be disgusting.  Garlic on breakfast cereal?  Yikes.  Garlic on pumpkin pie?  No way buster.  This is all the more reason to double the amount of garlic in any recipe calling for it, to make up for all the foods that would be ruined by it.

Garlic also has uses other than for eating and is highly regarded in the medical world.  Garlic is a powerful antiseptic that can help calm digestive upset.  Garlic has proven to be excellent for cardiovascular health.  Garlic has been known to help cure the common cold and can be an expectorant for coughing.  I've used garlic to ease the irritation and ultimately cure yeast infections.  Yep, it's true, unwrap the raw garlic clove, put it in there(you know where I mean ladies, don't go too far, you need to get it out the next day), sleep, and take it out in the morning.  Doing this every night, and during the day if you need, until the symptoms have subsided and you are free from the prison of a yeast infection.  No gross creams, no stupid pills and instant relief from the pain and irritation.  

Whether the garlic goes in my food, in my oven, or in my vagina, it always serves its purpose of making the world a better place.

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